This photo made me think about some things in my SL a little bit, and suddenly I realized I might actually have something I felt like blogging again. It’s nothing earth-shattering to be sure, but it’s a little lesson I keep having to learn again and again. First, let me give you a little background.

When I was a little girl, I loved dancing. I’d make up routines to music all the time and begged my mom for dance lessons. I finally got to go to a clogging class, and I was just head over heels from the very first moment, but I never went back for a second class. There were lots of reasons for that but one of them was the teacher commenting to my mom that maybe I wasn’t cut out for dancing. Mom didn’t tell me that then of course because why would you ever say that to a 4-year-old?

So I had no more official dance classes for a long time, but I still loved dance. The dance style didn’t even really matter to me. I fell in love with ballet the first time I saw Swan Lake on a school trip. Musicals made my feet move all on their own even if I was just watching them on TV while sitting on the couch. I danced my heart out every chance I had but it was kind of my secret thing most of the time. Then in college, I ended up with a group of people who did competitive western dancing from two-stepping to line dancing, and one guy needed a partner, and then suddenly there I was dancing and even winning small prizes sometimes. That’s when mom told me why I never had another dance class, and we both laughed at how wrong that teacher had been. Of course I was cut out for dancing. It was in my heart even if I’d never be the best in the room.

And there you have part of the lesson I keep having to learn. Do what you love and enjoy it and be the best you can be at it, and don’t worry that you’re not the best. It doesn’t matter. Does it make your heart happy? Does it give you a reason to get up in the morning? Then that’s more than enough. Let yourself enjoy it. Stop worrying about how you look to other people or being scared you’re not good enough. Enjoy being happy.

And now I guess I should try to tie that back to the photo that I claimed started this whole thought process, huh? I worry a lot. Anyone who’s close to me knows that. I’m my own worst enemy when it comes to shutting myself down before I ever even really get going on something. I have a knack for making the most enjoyable activity into arduous work because I get these perfectionist blockades built up in my mind very easily and quickly. It’s hard to knock those down and to just enjoy something for what it is.

Shine started with one series of 10 eyes a year ago, and now I’ve done so many series of eyes that I’ve actually retired my oldest ones. My two latest series – Covet and Lustrous – are popular enough that I sell multiple pairs of them daily. Then the jewelry came, and I loved learning to make my own sculpts and seeing myself improve, and the jewelry also sells well, and I get great constructive feedback about it. And most importantly, I enjoy doing all of that and seeing my little shop grow. One would think it’s a win-win situation, but I keep falling into this trap of negating every positive thing that happens. I became that critical teacher telling myself now “You might not be cut out for this” for no other reason than I’m a perfectionist, but the truth is still there that if you’re having fun, then keep doing it. Stop thinking so much!

Why make life so hard when it doesn’t have to be? I was in a bit of a funk when I saw that lovely freebie skirt set from idk by Chav Paderborn, and for once, when I got that urge to just find the fun in SL again, I did it, and that photo up there was the result. And I look at it, and I think about how dancing has been that thing I get to do without worrying about the need to be perfect or more than who I am. I need to find more of that spirit in SL, and I’m working on it. I want to dance through life and not worry my way through it, and while I won’t change overnight and will need to keep reminding myself of the lesson, SL seems like one of the perfect places to begin the change.